How did my first few days go? I am definitely the coolest cat ever to inhabit the White house! Who cares that I don't have a clue what I'm doing, I am living large, man! I get to work out anytime I please. The press just loves me and I can blame to poor sap before me for anything bad that happens for at least the next 6-10 years I'm president, maybe longer.
I have some serious plans to get the US economy to resemble Sweden and make every citizen reliant on the Feds to keep em' in line!